thank u?

it means so much when bosses actually say thanks to their employees for a job well done. each of us who has work our butt off in Hulu Selangor (HS) received a congrats and thank you sms from our CNE and OC in HS for what we did there.

i'm thinking if THE PARTY did not make it, will we still received the same sms? hmmm....
shoooshhh...go away negative thoughts!

a hulu i went to..

hari terakhir di Hulu Selangor.
haha..to tell the truth, i have to admit that i wish i could stay til sunday.
my colleagues are still here covering till the election day.
i was spared cuz i've bought my ticks to penang.
and i admit that walaupun sumbangan tak seberapa pun, tapi the experience and the staring on how all these peeps (media and politicians) work their butts off here are priceless.
i'm no pro here..waaaaayyyy far from better.. haha.
but all i can say, we're just doing our job accordingly...yg pastinya, atas arahan orang atasan.
and the politicians, well.. politicians are politicians.
tak tahu yg mana satu boleh dipercayai. dah berhenti berharap.

apart from work, i must say that the team of friends there make it more enjoyable.
had a good laugh with all of them especially time makan malam.. all the stories and jokes came out.. stress reliever betul. and tomorrow is another day.

thank u for the opportunity and time spent there...
at least now i know where kalumpang is situated at... ;-)

wishlist

been thinking to get these for myself:

1. a new Swatch
2. a new mobile phone
3. long vacation
4. new clothes
5. watching one or two good movies
6. new me?

i dont knw what is this? a disease? no?

burning the past ;-)

i have to say thanks to xan** for keeping me sane for a while. how depressing is that? i cldnt even control my own emotions without the help of that tiny pinkish med! like before, it started from the toss and turn sleepless nights two days ago.

at this mo, im feeling normal. the normal mode. the one of the nicest feeling that i wish it cld stay for ever. bleakness never occur at this stage. everything seems fine and not much to worry. at least for a few days. am quite sure after three days, it'll start all over again - the feeling of lifeless, lazy, sluggish, calm but intense, down the drain, sad, regretful, alone, lonely, empty, trapped, hopeless, miserable, being forced to live and the worst condition is when i become very very very fragile and cld cry any second just thinking about life. frankly, for me life is mostly unfair and too much of uncertainties. uncertainties make me sick. homesick. mindsick. lovesick. am sick of being sick.

for these few months, i start living on a daily basis. what happened today, ends today. tomorrow is another new day. it does make me more human and worry less. but, sometimes it hit me especially during pre-menses stage. it'll take a week before the first day..sometimes two weeks before, which means i only have two weeks to feel really normal.

living on a daily basis also means that i stop ..well, at least i try to stop dwelling on the past. it is indeed a waste of time to think about past mistakes and stuffs tho thoughts still occasionally come and trouble my mind.

for me, right now living on a daily basis also means that i have to put aside the uncertainties..what future holds for me. when dwelling on the past-and-thinking the uncertainties-thoughts get worst, thats when xan** come to the rescue. and to be honest, i hate it.

but that doesnt make me an aimless person. very very deeeeeeeeep down in my heart, i still aim and hope.


"Hope is putting faith to work when doubting would be easier"~Author Unknown